How many months, years, even decades have you wished and prayed, “how do I get rid of the inferiority complex?”
I know it from my personal struggle, that time, when many nights when I would have a hard time going to sleep, overthinking, how to overcome inferiority complex.
I could see the symptoms of inferiority complex plaguing my day-to-day life and for a long time I did nothing about it.
I also reached a point, when I started wondering, is inferiority complex a mental illness.
I do not wish that kind of life for you. In this article you will find definitive practical solutions on how to overcome inferiority complex, causes, the symptoms of inferiority complex to look out for, the Triggers of inferiority complex and much more. Hope this article helps you answer the question how to overcome inferiority complex
What is an Inferiority Complex?
It is a feeling when you feel you are not good enough. It is a feeling of self doubt. The feeling of inferiority complex is similar to feeling dirty and you can do nothing about it. That’s how I felt when I suffered from an inferiority complex.
The American psychological Association defines an inferiority complex as:
“… feeling of inadequacy and insecurity, deriving from actual or imagined physical or psychological deficiency.”
For me, This definition is very mechanical, dry even, and it does not completely capture the essence of everything that the sufferer goes through.
I have gone through it, hundreds and thousands of people go through it everyday and it is more daunting than anything that we have tried to overcome.
Let’s not kid ourself – it is a struggle!
It has been a struggle for me and I am here to help you through it, the way I helped myself.
Symptoms of Inferiority Complex
Inferiority complex manifests in many ways some of them are listed below while some of them will be very much personal to you.
- Unhealthy comparison of yourself with others
- Feeling that you have been constantly compared with others even though it may not be true
- Feeling that people talk bad about you behind your back
- A feeling that you are being mocked or laughed at
- Feeling of insecurity
- Feeling of unworthiness
- A deep sense of self doubt
These are some of the ways that I have perceived the signs of inferiority complex. These are some of the ways that the people I have worked with have perceived an inferiority complex. And then, again there will be a few ways which are so much more personal to you. Do not discount them.
Discounting is one of the mechanisms you may use to cope with the unpleasant feelings. It leads to denial and escapism. Introspection, analysis, and acceptance of your feelings and beliefs is the first step towards solving the main question – how do I get rid of the inferiority complex?
What Triggers Inferiority Complex?
Inferiority complex is created in childhood. It is triggered by present day comparison. In our Childhood, our parents and our caregivers compared us badly, sometimes unfairly, with our siblings or cousins or generally with the kids of our age around us.
To be honest it is something that they do to motivate us not realising the harm that it causes us.
Later in life, When we come across a similar situation where we are compared, where we are told how the other person is better than us, an inferiority complex is triggered.
It is a childhood trauma, a childhood emotion, and we instantly go back to being that kid again.
What are Inferior Feelings? What are Signs of Inferiority complex?
These are low vibrational feelings and emotions that we feel in our body and mind. It is not just in your head but inferiority feelings have physical manifestations too. Some of the inferior feelings include:
- Lack of self confidence
- Seeking of validation
- Feeling of shame
- Feeling of unworthiness
- Feeling like you are always being mocked by your friends and peers
- Imagine negative judgement even when no one has expressed it
- Feeling Guilt and shame on your setbacks
- Feeling unsafe
- Feel submissive. You will rarely stand up for yourself (or your view), and have difficulty asserting your needs
- You try to become a Perfectionist. If something is not perfect in your eyes, you think it’s a failure.
- Fear of Rejection
- Over critical behaviour
Is Inferiority Complex a Mental illness?
Inferiority complex is not a mental health disorder per se. It is not a mental illness it is rather a symptom of a deeper issue or deeper psychological problem
- It can be part of anxiety disorder.
- It can be part of depressive disorder.
- It could be a part of a childhood trauma that you’re carrying.
- It could be part of a very unhealthy coping mechanism.
How to Overcome Inferiority Complex?
It is not immposbbile to get rid of inferiority complex. To overcome an inferiority complex one has to work continuously on oneself – their mind, their beliefs, their thought process, their perceptions, but most importantly their childhood trauma which caused the inferiority complex in the first place. So, here is it, how you fix inferiority complex:
Figure out whom you feel inferior to in the first place.
Inferiority complex can be called as a comparison problem. It is about feeling lesser to someone. So the first step is to understand around whom do you feel lesser to?
Is it your sibling?
Is it your boss or managers at work?
Is it with your partner or spouse?
How about your close friends and peers at school or college?
This is an important step – to realise with whom and where is your inferiority complex triggered around – people and surroundings. Then, you can cultivate awareness for the signs of inferiority complex when they start coming up.
Confront your Biggest fears.
Your fears are one of the main sources of your inferiority complex. Hence Confronting your fears is your number one priority. Self love and self admiration is going to be important when you face your fear.
Try to find the cause of your feelings.
The inferior feelings are established and rooted in your childhood. Thus, introspecting and reflecting on those pivotal moments in your childhood when you first felt inferior is a great way to understand,realise, and work on the root cause of your inferior feelings and your inferiority Complex both.
Stop Worrying About What Others Think About You
Trying to stop your thoughts is easier said than done. Yet there are ways to control your mind and your thoughts that create the diseases of worrying and the pain of what others will think about you. The best way to stop your thought process is using breathwork. The breath is connected to the state of mind. Every emotion and thought has an impact on the rhythm of the breath. And hence we can use this connection to manage our thoughts and stop worrying in the moment. Longer interventions include working on your childhood trauma and belief systems.
Understand that we’re all inferior in some ways.
Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. You need to acknowledge this about yourself and also in others. The difference is that a person with an inferiority complex allows their weaknesses to create turmoil and nasty unpleasant feelings in them. But just look around, especially at all the successful people, and even those who create inferiority complex in you and notice how they work around their weaknesses. They are not perturbed by it; rather, they plan for it and create solutions to address them. In finding and executing those solutions, is the secret to getting over your inferiority complex.
Stop wanting to be like others.
Inferiority complex is also rooted in your desire to be like someone else. Especially to be that person who triggers you. But no matter how much time and effort you put in, know this – you will never become that person.
You will always be you.
What makes that person unique is their journey, their environment, their beliefs and actions while you are on your own journey and have your own environment, beliefs, and action. And exactly for this reason you can never truly become someone else.
It is much easier to be your own self than to become someone else. Believe me! Been there, done that and it’s not Worth it.
Learn to Say “No”.
Saying No is incredibly difficult for those with an inferiority complex. They feel that if they say no, those people will think less about them. People with inferiority complex fear that those people whom they say No to will value them less and their worth will go down.
This often leaves those with inferiority complex being overworked and overburdened with responsibilities that are not theirs in the first place. They are often taken advantage of by people who realise their inferior issues and use it against them. So, learn to say NO when you don’t want to do something. Assert yourself in a calm and polite manner.
You need to be kind to yourself.
Inferiority complexes make us think that if one thing could change, our lives would be great. Possession of material and superficial things won’t magically fix the problem. Focusing on the strengths, values, and positive assets you possess. Learning to accept these things can help you move towards a happier life.Try to be kind. Practice self-care to your mind, body, and soul as well. Eat healthier food. Practice meditation. Go out and enjoy the things that you love doing.
Ways to overcome inferiority complex at work
Use comparison as an inspiration:
It is quite natural to compare yourself with the people that you work with. Healthy competition is a very powerful motivator but at the same time this can also give a feeling of inferiority, anxiety, and jealousy.
Inferiority complex should not ruin this motivation for you. You have to remember that since you have been hired by the same company, you have the required competent skills. Even with all the comparison going around, remember to keep it a healthy competition and that you are an equal among them.
Do frequent reality checks.
One of the dirty habits of people with inferiority complex is that they immediately hold themselves responsible and look upon themself as a culprit when things go wrong at work.
This is a very unhealthy behaviour and you need to sit down and think for yourself. First ascertain, whether the problem at work is caused by something that you did or was there the role of your environment and other people involved?
Another major issue faced at the workplace includes, “Not feeling valued”. People with inferiority complex take this as a sign of their self-worth and beat up their self esteem and self confidence.
One of the beautiful ways to overcome inferiority complex at work is to talk to your colleagues to check if they are also feeling the same way. If that is the case, then, help each other out in the office with mutual admiration and pat on the back. This will boost the morale and self confidence of everyone involved and create strong bonds of friendship as well
Act on evidence, not emotions.
People who have an inferiority complex are very often triggered by the same emotions that they felt during their childhood. These emotions are always underlying and are just waiting to be drawn out.
Think, introspect and give time to be sure that what you are feeling, the inferior feelings, is based on the concrete evidence of your actions in the present moment, in the here and now or is it because of old memories and emotions which are messing up your mind.
Spend more time with positive coworkers.
Being around supportive, positive people are wonderful to remind you of how you’re supposed to treat yourself.
Just don’t waste time on colleagues who make you feel less and shitty. They don’t listen when you speak, or don’t make you feel accomplished and accepted.
Overcome Inferiority Complex With Online Counselling
In case you need active help in achieving your goal to overcome inferiority complex, I can definitely help you with that.
The way that I can help you overcome inferiority complex is by using your breath. The breath along with the life force energy can do wonders bypassing the logical mind and even your belief system.
Check out the article – REBIRTHING BREATHWORK – A SIMPLE YET MAGICAL EXPERIENCE to discover what a powerful breathwork can do for you.
You can connect with me for a discovery call on whatsapp on +91-9819469778 or write to me on [email protected]